NOTICE: Cooking from historical books makes Norfolk so different

That’s the problem with the story – no matter what happened, there was always someone who knew it would happen.

I wasn’t much of it, so I’m inclined to take a reasonable Norfolk stance and treat it all with a fair amount of suspicion.

I’m known to step in when no one is looking to change things, mostly for the better. Like transforming “Turnip” Townshend into “Turnup Townshend” and giving him credit for introducing proper pants for workers in the Raynham estate.

They attracted and inspired the early fashion houses in the Burnhams and Creakes and the production of fur-lined pajamas for winter in Great and Little Snoring. Thomas Coke of Holkham followed this pioneering spirit when he championed the sharing of sheep, a brilliant idea destined to spread in the golden age of cooperative agriculture.

Both luminaries loved their food and may well have influenced Norfolk’s four-course menu at Carrow Road and other fine dining establishments. This should not be confused with the exceptional community work in the Melton Constable area of ​​the early 1800s, when a quartet of forward-thinking law enforcement officers in turn took on the task of eradicating wickedness in the communities. most affected parishes.

The Norfolk Four-Cop Rotation system gained many admirers long before Robert Peel had the idea of ​​sorting out a London police force. Speaking of capital gains in the settlements of Norfolk, would our beloved Chelsea-on-Sea even have seen the light of day if Horatio Nelson had been born in Barton Bendish rather than Burnham Thorpe?

It’s not too hard to imagine well-heeled stage, movie and dumpling stars landing near RAF Marham in preparation for a relaxing weekend among the distinguished folks of Mayfair-at-Ease around the preserved charms of Barton Bendish, Beachamwell, Boughton and Bexwell.

What if the Danes and Vikings had left their rape and silage behind when they called to see how our broadband was going? If they had instead focused on fostering the noble art of dwile-flonking, it could now be an Olympic sport and a regular source of gold for Britain with beer cleaning and pitchforks. .

What if Robert Kett and his rebel cronies had won the Battle of Dussindale in 1549? Has this large subdivision north of Norwich received a building permit? What if Clement Scott had gone all the way to Bacton on his clifftop hike arriving at Cromer by train in 1883? Would he have weighed the prospects for natural gas before an unnatural pipeline to the Victorian yuppies of London?


Archie Macaulay, former Norwich City manager
– Credit: Archant

What if Norwich City had beaten Luton Town in their replay of the FA Cup semi-final and won the trophy in 1959? Would Sir Archie Macaulay have tasted World Cup glory with England instead of this guy who did a useful job at Ipswich?

What if King’s Lynn and Thetford had rejected the expansion plans actively encouraged by supporters of the London spillover in the 1960s? Would they be more attractive places to live and work because they would not have listened to the voices of the sirens?

What if all those people who were strongly opposed to the introduction of wheelie bins a few years ago had won their case? Would civilization as we know it, love it and recycle it been left in a position to poke fun at Norfolk’s growing green reputation?

I dare say that some old men stuck in their family ways found something to complain about when the Romans arrived to enlighten the peasants through the good offices of their lawyers, Sacking, Burning & Looting. A hot bath every month, whether necessary or not, set the tone for firm but far-reaching decrees to sort out the wandering natives.

Boadicea, one of the first ‘real’ people in Norfolk history, showed just how dangerous wheelie bins can be by sticking knives in their sides and leading a bloody revolution against newcomers. She lost after extra time to Colchester, St Albans and London.

Terrifying images of our warrior queen have flourished in folklore over the centuries. A Greek columnist at the time told The Iceni Bugle: “She was the tallest, most terrible looking, wildest face and harsh voice, having a profusion of yellow hair. which fell on his hips and wearing a large golden necklace. . “

The Romans took revenge by building roads, including a transit road called the Peddars Way. This connected the north of Essex with the Wash and Lincolnshire. The world was shrinking.

Perhaps the fundamentalists of northern folklore fell into one or two traps of convenience in 7000 – 8000 BC. a much larger area than at any time since.

Stricter passport control and the nationalization of the flint mines at Weeting could have helped. But Norfolk knew deep down that their destiny lay with the missionaries of Europe.

Jump apart:

An old story of Norfolk, inevitably true, features a faithful of the country being interviewed by a local journalist on the occasion of his 100th birthday.

“You must have seen many changes in your life,” said the enthusiastic young scribe. “Yis” growled the venerable of the village. “And I opposed all of them! “

Such an unwavering challenge can always attract a smile or two or even a sweet nod of approval from those who like their local characters to mix the colorful with the cursed.

Overall, however, our rapidly changing homeland now has little affection for the remnants of the Drawbridge Brigade.

Ironically, the strongest proponents of a rigid non-expansionist policy in some parts of Norfolk come from relatively recent settlers who have found the Promised Land and do not want it to be sullied by those they have left behind. These are the subtleties of an open approach to population flows.


Outfit poorly suited for question time

Outfit poorly suited for question time
– Credit: Submitted

I must have smiled a year or two ago when Question Time rolled over Norwich with David Dimbleby at the wheel and someone noticed a marked lack of local accents on the parade. The TV panel made no concessions although I understand that a proposal to wear eye patches in honor of Nelson County was only dismissed at the last minute.

Just imagine the outcry if this program ended with an attempt to make itself understood by Norfolk at large after nearly an hour of intense debate on national and global issues. elegant white blouse with string around the waist and cow manure splashed rubber boots Please remove this straw from your mouth and ask us your question about futility rites….

Fortunately, the BBC at the highest level knows better than to wade through the troubled parish waters after countless years of mistaking Norfolk and Suffolk for Devon and Somerset. They are even playing fairly safe with a regional release as Corby, Kettering and Milton Keynes rub shoulders with Cromer, King’s Lynn and Moulton St Mary.

Newcomers to our golden acres must be wondering where the South East and England begin and end. Life was much simpler when we had East Anglia made up of neighbors quite willing to fall out, come to terms with each other, stick together when it mattered, boast of their subtle differences, and generally leave the rest of the world green. jealousy.

“This special relationship” meant that Norfolk and Suffolk left themselves in the sunny reassurance that they did not have to go far to advocate for full independence or to seek the understanding of the other for a possible bilateral approach to end. interference from London or other foreign parties.


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